The truth about body-shaming in the queer community

03/02/2023

The truth about body-shaming in the queer communityBody shaming is an issue that has plagued the queer community for a long time, but we don't talk often enough about it.

by Luh Tsele

03-02-2023 16:29

in Health and Fitness

A hand written stop.Image: Teunie van Hernen/Flickr

It has become a tradition for people to try and reinvent themselves in the new year, and there is no problem with doing that, as long as you are doing it for yourself and not body-shaming others while doing it.

--

Body shaming Body shaming is an issue that we don't talk about enough in the queer community, which is odd because it has become one of the strongest pillars that define us, especially men who seek men.

I call it a strong pillar because at every turn we are bombarded with no fats and no fems don't even take my word for it, open the gates of the dating app Grindr and read the gospel.

On this queer dating app, we are conditioned to believe that to be worthy of love, companionship, or a simple hookup, you have to look a certain way.

--

Having to live in a world that puts us under so much scrutiny, you would think we would be kinder to one another but that isn't the case. Full-figured queer individuals are made to feel less than others because of their body shape.

ALSO READ: Sam Smith's new body-positive video celebrates queer sexuality

Masculine ripped looking men are glorified and put on the pedestal as the tokens of what an attractive man should look like.

--

I've had someone actually say, If you lost a little bit more weight, I think we could go on a date, Said Sam Coffie on the American morning tv show Good Morning America.

I didn't like being big, and in this gay industry you don't win when you are full figured said a friend of mine in a conversation about weight loss.

My friend and I were not even talking about body standards in the queer community, we were talking about weight loss in general, but at that moment he felt the need to emphasise that gay men do not appreciate full-figured men.

Body positivity Recently we have seen the body positivity movement rise to combat body shaming, simply put, body positivity focuses on promoting acceptance of all body types.

ALSO READ: Big Brother Titans' is here but queer representation is not

This movement has taught us that skinny is not a measure of beauty or health. Body positivity has taught us the simple act of being kinder to ourselves, and our bodies. It is important to note that body positivity is not advocating for obesity but rather holistic health that includes mind and body.

I implore the LGBTIQ community to cultivate being body positive not only to others but to ourselves as well. Learn to love and appreciate yourself, and do not let what you see on social media be a reason to hate your body.

Most of us are dealing with the same issues, so reach out to a trusted friend or family member and talk about your insecurities. Most importantly stop talking negatively about yourself and your body.

It's time to take a stance I'm not going to be able to please everyone with my outward appearance. Someone's always going to have a critique, and someone's always going to have some negativity to say about me.

So all that matters is what I think of it. I had to go deep inside myself and look in the mirror. Looking in the mirror and accepting what's in the mirror is very, very difficult. And right now, I love it every time I look in the mirror said American singer, rapper, and flutist Lizzo.

The LGBTIQ community already has to endure a lot from a highly heteronormative society, let's not add to our struggle. The consequences of body shaming include anxiety, depression, and other health-related issues such as body dysmorphia.

I believe that the queer community knows better than anyone how difficult it is to maintain a healthy state of mind, so it shouldn't be hard to be kind and help others take a step in the right direction with their mental health.

ALSO READ: The search for Miss Drag South Africa 2023 has begun

CLICK HERE TO READ MORE ARTICLES FROM LUH TSELE

SOAPIE QUIZ: How well do you know Scandal!'? WIN R1 000 in cash! ENTER HERE

LINK:	https://www.thesouthafrican.com/lifestyle/health-fitness/the-truth-abo...
	See more stories from thesouthafrican

Most recent headlines

05/01/2027

Worlds first 802.15.4ab-UWB chip verified by Calterah and Rohde & Schwarz to be demoed at CES 2026

Worlds first 802.15.4ab-UWB chip verified by Calterah and Rohde & Schwarz to be ...

01/06/2026

Dolby Sets the New Standard for Premium Entertainment at CES 2026

January 6 2026, 05:30 (PST) Dolby Sets the New Standard for Premium Entertainment at CES 2026 Throughout the week, Dolby brings to life the latest innovatio...

02/05/2026

Dalet Flex LTS Delivers Smarter Search, Faster Editing, and an AI-Ready Foundation for Modern Media

Dalet, a leading technology and service provider for media-rich organizations, t...

01/05/2026

NBCUniversal's Peacock to Be First Streamer to Integrate Dolby's Full Suite of Premium Picture and Sound Innovations

January 5 2026, 18:30 (PST) NBCUniversal's Peacock to Be First Streamer to ...

01/04/2026

DOLBY AND DOUYIN EMPOWER THE NEXT GENERATON OF CREATORS WITH DOLBY VISION

January 4 2026, 18:00 (PST) DOLBY AND DOUYIN EMPOWER THE NEXT GENERATON OF CREATORS WITH DOLBY VISION Douyin Users Can Now Create And Share Videos With Stun...

18/03/2026

Net Insight Names Larissa GrnerMeeus CPO

Newly named chief product officer (CPO), Larissa G rner Meeus will return to Net Insight on May 4. Larissa G rner Meeus will become CPO of Net Insight on May 4...

18/03/2026

SVG Europe's The Football Summit 2026: Select Sessions Now Available to Watch on SVG PLAY

SVG Europe's The Football Summit 2026 explored how the sports broadcasting i...

18/03/2026

SVG's SportsTech@NABShow Blog Goes Live as Countdown to Vegas Heats Up

The 2026 NAB Show kicks off one month from today and SVG is once again set to cover the show from every angle. SVG's SportsTech@NAB Show Blog is now live - ...

18/03/2026

The Premiere of Dead Lover Showcases Grave Robbing and Sex With a Giant Finger

(L-R) The cast and crew of Dead Lover at The Ray Theater for its premiere at the 2025 Sundance Film Festival. (Photo by Robin Marshall/Shutterstock for Sundan...

18/03/2026

Music Row Piano from Wiltone Productions

Yamaha C7 captured in Nashville Wiltone Productions have announced the release of Music Row Piano, a deeply sampled Yamaha C7 piano library that's been ...

18/03/2026

Techivation introduce T-Warmer Mk2

Bass-enhancement plug-in upgraded Along with a steady stream of new releases, Techivation have recently been revisiting some of the older plug-ins in their ...

18/03/2026

Tonal Balance Control 3 from iZotope

Mix-reference plug-in overhauled iZotope's powerful mix-referencing plug-in has just reached its third major version, and now boasts a new capture proce...

18/03/2026

Toontrack Transistor Organ EKX

Latest EZKeys 2 expansion arrives Toontrack's staggering collection of EZKeys 2 expansions has grown once again, and the latest instalment delivers a on...

18/03/2026

Jess Ho explores the politics of food in new SBS Audio podcast For The Culture

Jess Ho explores the politics of food in new SBS Audio podcast For The Culture 18 March, 2026 Media releases New SBS Audio podcast For The Culture, hosted ...

18/03/2026

Future-ready broadcasts with ATSC 3.0 and enhanced services from Rohde & Schwarz at NAB 2026

Future-ready broadcasts with ATSC 3.0 and enhanced services from Rohde & Schwarz...

18/03/2026

LCTWS 2026

London Calling - When The Industry Convened to Help Streaming Find its MoJo In this blog, Laura Rognoni reflects on key discussions from the Connected TV World...

18/03/2026

SMPTE Unveils 2026 NAB Show Educational Presentations

SMPTE Unveils 2026 NAB Show Educational Presentations Brie Clayton March 18, 2026 0 Comments SMPTE , the home of media professionals, technologists, a...

18/03/2026

Auditel Ad Campaign Shot on Blackmagic PYXIS 12K

Auditel Ad Campaign Shot on Blackmagic PYXIS 12K Brie Clayton March 18, 2026 0 Comments LED wall virtual production blends 12K open gate acquisition w...

18/03/2026