
5th December 2023
TV channel Gold challenged the nation to come up with the best topical Christmas cracker jokes for annual competition - now in its 11th year.
The winning festive joke for 2023: Did you hear about the Christmas cake on display in the British Museum? It was Stollen.
Topics including Barbenheimer, transport strikes and Twitters rebrand to X also inspired the jolly dose of holiday humour this year.
A festive joke about a Christmas cake being stollen from the British Museum has been revealed as the winner of an annual competition to find the best new Christmas cracker gags.
Jokes about Barbie, Elon Musk and HS2 also feature in the list of festive funnies released today...
The winning jokes have been revealed by nations favourite comedy channel Gold as part of its annual festive competition (now in its eleventh year) to find the very best modern Christmas cracker jokes.
Gold challenged the British public to post their original festive gags to X (formerly Twitter), which were then shortlisted by a panel of judges and put to an anonymous public vote of 2,000 British adults.
Golds top 10 funniest new Christmas cracker jokes for 2023 are revealed as:
Did you hear about the Christmas cake on display in the British Museum? It was Stollen.
Why is Elon Musks Christmas dinner so awkward? He cant stop talking about his X.
Why isnt Barbie having turkey for Christmas dinner this year? Chic-Ken is enough.
Why arent any schools allowed to put on a nativity this year? They couldnt find a stable building.
What impact will the 20mph speed limit in Wales have on the charts this year? Chris Rea will be driving home for Easter.
What happened to Mark Zuckerbergs novelty jumper when he had a cage fight with Elon Musk? He was left with nothing but Threads.
Whats the difference between The Polar Express and HS2? Ones a fantasy about a train and the others a film with Tom Hanks.
What did Robert Oppenheimer get Barbie for Christmas? Atomic Kenergy.
Why are the train drivers on the naughty list this year? Because theyve already had three strikes!
How does Margot Robbie decorate her Nativity scene? With 3 wise Ken.
The annual joke competition celebrates Golds seasonal TV scheduling, which includes classic festive episodes of Britains most-loved comedies such as Dads Army, Only Fools and Horses, The Vicar of Dibley and Keeping Up Appearances.
Comedy critic Bruce Dessau, who led the Gold judging panel, says,
Despite the tumultuous times of the past year, the British public has once again found the silver, or in this case gold, lining in some cheerful jokes. This years modern Christmas cracker jokes, spanning from cultural hit Barbenheimer and the misadventures of Parisian bed bugs, to seemingly never-ending strikes and terrible train woes, prove that we are a nation with an unwaveringly inventive sense of humour.
Gerald Casey, Gold channel director, says,
This year has witnessed a wealth of comedic talent in our competition, perfectly combining festive funnies and cultural moments of 2023. We hope this years jokes can provide a hearty laugh alongside Golds Christmas programming, including much-loved classic episodes and our new star-packed scripted comedy Blood Actually, the latest addition to Golds hugely popular Murder, They Hope series.
The author of the winning joke, Chris Douch aged (37) from Oxfordshire, received the top prize of £1,500 towards a holiday, a festive hamper, a box of bespoke Gold Christmas Crackers and a novelty turkey costume from Gold show Blood Actually: A Murder, They Hope Mystery as worn by Lee Mack.
The top six jokes are included within bespoke boxes of Golds Christmas crackers, which will be presented to this years winners.
All the jokes voted on by the British public are original content to the best of Golds knowledge.
Gold marks the festive season with brand new UKTV original Blood Actually: a Murder, They Hope mystery airing on the 16th December at 9pm. Fronted by Johnny Vegas and Sian Gibson, the special welcomes a whole host of special guests including Martin Kemp, Anita Dobson, Rose Ayling-Ellis, Lee Mack, Sherrie Hewson, Sarah Hadland to name a few. Catch up with the previous Murder, They Hope series on Sky and Virgin.
-
Further information please contact: Rosie Barker: rosie.barker@taylorherring.com
Notes for Editors:
About Gold
Dedicated to celebrating the best of British comedy, Gold is the nations favourite comedy channel. Classic British comedy series loved by all the family sit comfortably alongside new UKTV Original scripted comedies crafted by some of the nations finest comedic minds, such as Dads Army: The Lost Episodes, Murder, They Hope, The Cockfields and Sandylands. Meanwhile Golds unscripted series reunite the stars and partnerships of the nations best-loved shows to get to the heart of what makes them so evergreen - from passion projects such as French & Saunders: Funny Women, Billy Connolly Does..., Lenny Henrys Race Through Comedy and Ricky and Ralfs Very Northern Road Trip to the retrospective likes of dinnerladies diaries and The Fast Show: Just A Load of Blooming Catchphrases.
Gold is the perfect tonic to make you laugh whatever the time of day.
Gold.uktv.co.uk / @goldchannel
About UKTV
UKTV has been at the forefront of branded television for over 30 years, entertaining the nation with programmes they love. Its leading brands - Dave, Gold, W, Drama, Alibi, Eden and Yesterday - span comedy, entertainment, natural history, factual and scripted drama, and are delivered to audiences through UKTV Play, Freeview, Sky, Virgin Media, BT, TalkTalk, YouView, Freesat and Amazon Fire. The broadcaster is a significant investor in British creativity and is committed to working with new and established writers, directors and programme-makers.
UKTV is part of BBC Studios, the UKs most-awarded production company, a world
Most recent headlines
05/01/2027
Worlds first 802.15.4ab-UWB chip verified by Calterah and Rohde & Schwarz to be ...
04/08/2026
Dalet, a leading technology and service provider for media-rich organizations, t...
04/07/2026
April 7 2026, 19:00 (PDT) Detective Conan: Fallen Angel of the Highway Opens in...
05/06/2026
Berklee Study Reveals Video Has Become Essential to Music Careers Survey findings show social platforms have become the primary source of music for video cont...
04/06/2026
Sony Electronics is introducing the SRG-AS10, a 4K 60p-compatible PTZ auto-frami...
04/06/2026
This recent grad from Spring, TX, led creative-video output for the Aggies' men's basketball team last season and has been producing video and creating ...
04/06/2026
For the first time at a women's golf major, every player in the field will r...
04/06/2026
Three Panasonic PT-RQ45 40,000-lumen 3-Chip DLP projectors made their first live...
04/06/2026
Bitmovin and Akamai have announced a collaboration with NRJ Group, a French mult...
04/06/2026
Telestream will exhibit at InfoComm 2026 (Booth N7952), demonstrating media work...
04/06/2026
Sony has announced the development of RIALTO 65, a 65mm format image sensor block for the VENICE 2 digital cinema camera, targeting release in the first half of...
04/06/2026
KOKUSAI DENKI Electric America will exhibit at InfoComm 2026 (Booth N8025, June ...
04/06/2026
Bell Media's TSN and RDS are the exclusive Canadian broadcasters of FIFA Wor...
04/06/2026
The Challenge: Receiving Heavy Media Files From Road Games Quickly and ReliablyT...
04/06/2026
MASV, a managed file transfer platform used in broadcast and live sports product...
04/06/2026
NESN has announced the appointment of Fahad Haider as Vice President of Operations and Engineering. Haider returns to NESN, where he previously served as Vice P...
04/06/2026
David J. Halberstam, who spent almost 50 years in sports as a broadcaster and an executive, died June 2 after a years-long battle with brain cancer.
Over his l...
04/06/2026
Although collegiate production programs are tasked with delivering high-quality ...
04/06/2026
California studio, two production trucks, global distribution system are combine...
04/06/2026
New global program empowers and supports storytellers through scriptwriting course and access to industry experts
TikTok and Sundance Institute today announce...
04/06/2026
Steinberg DAWs now boast in-depth Tonalic integration
Celemony's innovative virtual session musician plug-in has just received an update that brings ARA...
04/06/2026
Get Hands-On With Over 20 Mic Brands
GearExpo UK is fast approaching, and if you've been looking for a chance to check out some new mics, then you'r...
04/06/2026
Combos feature new Amplifier Intelligence engine
Positive Grid's latest release sees the company introduce two new combo amplifiers that promise to offe...
04/06/2026
Is Your Job Making You Work this June?
4 June, 2026
Media releases
SBS Launches the World Cup Watchers' Rights Association to Stand Up For Australians&...
04/06/2026
Statement regarding unauthorised use of SBS logos on third party social content
4 June, 2026
Media releases
SBS has become aware of social media posts in c...
04/06/2026
Share
Copy link
Facebook
X
Linkedin
Bluesky
Email...
04/06/2026
Bitmovin, a leading provider of video streaming infrastructure, and Akamai, the cybersecurity and cloud computing company that powers and protects business onli...
04/06/2026
American Underground (AU), the Startup Hub of the South and a community of mor...
04/06/2026
Share
Copy link
Facebook
X
Linkedin
Bluesky
Email...
04/06/2026
Share
Copy link
Facebook
X
Linkedin
Bluesky
Email...
04/06/2026
Share
Copy link
Facebook
X
Linkedin
Bluesky
Email...
04/06/2026
Share
Copy link
Facebook
X
Linkedin
Bluesky
Email...
04/06/2026
Share
Copy link
Facebook
X
Linkedin
Bluesky
Email...
04/06/2026
Share
Copy link
Facebook
X
Linkedin
Bluesky
Email...
04/06/2026
Share
Copy link
Facebook
X
Linkedin
Bluesky
Email...
04/06/2026
Share
Copy link
Facebook
X
Linkedin
Bluesky
Email...
04/06/2026
NVIDIA and Microsoft Reinvent Windows PCs for the Age of Personal AI
Brie Clayton June 3, 2026
0 Comments
RTX Spark - a 1-Petaflop Superchip, the Full...
04/06/2026
Inside the Peaky Blinders: The Immortal Man Grade
Brie Clayton June 3, 2026
0 Comments
Simone Grattarola discusses shaping the look in DaVinci Resolve...
04/06/2026
Cine Gear Expo Announces 2026 Awards of Excellence Recipients
Brie Clayton June 3, 2026
0 Comments
Ed Lachman ASC, Caleb Deschanel ASC, and M. David M...
04/06/2026
St. Vincents Live with Orchestra Tour to Feature Berklee Alum Ruby Plume Berklee alumni St. Vincent and Ruby Plume will appear on the same bill across seven d...
04/06/2026
Home to cutting-edge sovereign AI infrastructure and robotics innovators, as well as one of the world's most passionate gaming communities, South Korea is o...
04/06/2026
Back to All News
All the Truth in My Lies Coming to Netflix on August 28
Entertainment
04 June 2026
GlobalSpain
Link copied to clipboard
Download the imag...
04/06/2026
Back to All News
Larry Tanz, VP of Content, EMEA, Delivers a Keynote Speech at ...
04/06/2026
Back to All News
Turn Your Living Room into a Stadium With the New FIFA World ...
04/06/2026
Keeping conversations real on LinkedIn Published on Jun 4, 2026 Categories: Product News
LinkedIn Corporate Communications
Share
LinkedIn
Facebook ...
04/06/2026
BackStory follows four Irish young people as they travel back to their parents' homelands
Modern Irish identity is enriched by cultures and influences from...
04/06/2026
June's forecast with GeForce NOW: 100% chance of gaming.
GeForce NOW is lining up new adventures for the month, from big-name blockbusters to quirky indies...
03/06/2026
SES and Viva, Mexico's ultra low-cost airline, have launched multi-orbit satellite inflight connectivity on Viva's Airbus aircraft. A total of 60 A320s ...
03/06/2026
The College Football Playoff, ESPN, and TNT Sports have announced kick times and...